Tuesday, January 09, 2007

iPhone. Holy shit.

So the iPhone has finally been unveiled. And basically if you breathe air you want this thing.

And Mac chairman/owner/F├╝hrer Steve Jobs knows you want it.

He also knows he can fly and shoot lasers out of his eyes. Which would in most cases be a massive psychotic delusion, but as our Elite Opinion Tech-Snob correspondent said,

"At this point, if he says he can, I'd believe him."

That's no bullshit. The iPhone can do anything. Literally ANYTHING. Two models have been announced so far: a 4-gig and an 8-gig and the 8-gig comes with an integrated time machine

Which is ideal, because anyone who ISN'T impressed by this thing, must be from the far future- specifically a time when humans have developed telepathy and no longer need our silly ancient cell phone bricks.

Anyway, it looks like this:

And here's a list of the phone's features:

-Full net capabilities (with a resolution so good it actually makes surfing the 'Net on your phone viable.)

-Full email
-Mp3 player
-Video Player
-2 mega-pixel camera and picture viewer
-Full QWERTY touch-screen pad

And of course the phone itself is one large touch-screen widescreen badass.

This is basically science fiction come to life.

The phone's carrier is going to be Cingular and its release date is June. Starting price is about $500.00.

Go here for more details:


And try not to sell your soul...

No, not to Satan- to Steven Jobs.


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